A new wine rating system...

With all the hubbub surrounding the different wine rating systems and discussion about the extent different factors play a part of them, I’ve decided to create a new system. This system incorporates every aspect of experiencing a wine. This system is a first draft and I urge everyone to please help me renovate and improve the 100-point system. Together, we can make a truly excellent system that will actually mean something! So without any other introduction, here it is:

                                                                                                                             Yes    No
Price:
Did you have any reservations about how much the wine cost?                                -1    +1
Did your significant other need convincing for you to buy the bottle?                        -2    +2
Did your purchase cause you to not be able to buy any other necessity?                  -3    +3
Was the wine free?                                                                                                +4    n/a

Bottle:
Is the bottle made of glass?                                                                                    +1    +1
Does the bottle have a punt?                                                                                  +2    n/a
Is the empty bottle heavier than a full bottle of something cheaper?                          +3    +3
Is the bottle open?                                                                                                 +4    n/a

Label:
Is the label easy to read?                                                                                        +1    -1
Is the label clean and free of any tears?                                                                   +2    -1   
Is the label eye-catching?                                                                                       +3    +2
Is the label counterfeit?                                                                                           -4    +4

Capsule:
Does the bottle have a capsule?                                                                             +1    n/a
Are there signs of seepage?                                                                                    -2    +2
Is the capsule made of tin?                                                                                     +3    +1
Does the capsule match the label?                                                                          +4    -4

Closure:
Does the wine have a cork?                                                                                   +1    +1
Is the cork/closure easy to remove?                                                                       +2    -2
Does the cork/closure come out in one piece?                                                        +3    -1
Does the cork/closure match the label?                                                                  +4    -4

Sight:
Does the liquid look like wine?                                                                              +1    -3
Is a red wine reddish, a rose pinkish and a white wine yellowish?                           +2    -2
Is the wine clear of foreign objects?                                                                      +3    -3
Does the appearance look off?                                                                             -4    +4

Nose:
Are the aromas enticing?                                                                                      +1    -1
Does the wine smell clean?                                                                                  +2    -2
Do certain (positive) aroma characteristics come to mind?                                    +3    -3
Do the aromas make you think about what you smell?                                          +4    -2

Flavors:
Do you sense some mixture of alcohol, acidity, tannin and/or fruit?                        +1    -1
Do the flavors linger in your mouth for at least 15 seconds?                                  +2    -2
Do the flavors make you want to take another sip?                                              +3    -3
Is the wine balanced?                                                                                          +4    -4

Texture:
Is the wine liquid?                                                                                                +1    -3
If the wine is sparkling, does it have bubbles?                                                       +2    -2
If the wine is still, is it free of bubbles?                                                                  +3    -3
Is the wine balanced?                                                                                           +4    -4

Overall impression:
Have you been drinking wine for more than 30 years?                                          +1    -1
Have you ever had a better wine previously?                                                        -2    +2
Would you drink this wine again?                                                                        +3    -3
Do you want to add 4 points just for the hell of it?                                                +4    n/a

Does the wine have attributes that numbers just can't describe?                              *     n/a

Add up your score and you’ve just scored a wine like a professional!        
I’m __ points on that!

For those of you arithmetically inclined, you will notice that the highest that a wine can score in this system is 98* points for a still wine and 97* points for a sparkling. This is of course due to the fact that wines are living entities that can achieve perfection no more than you or I...

Getting to Know Mr. Brett Bruxellensis

Yesterday over at 1WineDude.com, the Dude proclaimed his disdain for wines affected by the yeast Brettanomyces bruxellensis. Piggybacking on his post seems appropriate as I was at a faults seminar last week at VinCo 2011 in Grand Junction, CO conducted by Lisa Van de Water of Vinotec Napa. While I've read about Brett, I had never really had the opportunity to taste the specific effects of this oft-maligned yet sometimes praised yeast. While Brett in and of itself is not bad, the resulting aromas and flavors of the compounds that it produces are. Terms often used to describe the effects of Brett are band-aid, smoked meat, stinky feet and barnyard. Not exactly what you want to think of when you think of wine.

Brett is not associated with soil or grapes but likes to live in wine barrels. Low sulfur levels, high pH, warm temperatures and old barrels are all conducive to Brett growth. These conditions are all associated with winemaking and therefore it CANNOT be attributed to terroir as so many people have tried to suggest. Bordeaux and the Rhône valley are wine regions often associated with Brett. Despite what should be an obvious flaw, these two regions are often associated with high scores from Robert Parker. Part of the growing opposition to Robert Parker and his 100-point rating system is that he obviously appreciates the characteristics that many people find off-putting.

Along with a group of local winemakers, I was able to smell and taste the three most prevalent compounds produced by this mean little guy. Lisa set out a variety of doctored wines that showed Brett flaws along with various other flaws such as 2-4-6 trichloroanisole (TCA), volatile acidity (VA), acetaldehyde, excess sulfur and oxidation. I learned that 4-ethyl phenol produces the band-aid aromas and isovaleric acid produces the funky cheese and barnyard scents associated with Brett. Those two were definitely deal killers for me. However, 4-ethyl guaiacol produces the pleasant (at least for me) smoked meat and spicy aromas. I do not think that the benefits of 4-ethyl guaiacol outweigh the gut-wrenchingness of 4-ethyl phenol and isovaleric acid. There are other ways to achieve smokey aromas than with Brett. If you're wondering exactly what this smoked meat smells like, find a bottle of liquid smoke at the grocery store and take a whiff.

In the seminar, we also tasted two actual wines from a mystery winery that had to be pulled from shelves due to excess faults. The first wine had moderate amounts of 4-ethyl phenol and 4-ethyl guaiacol. The smokey aromas and bacon flavors  were much more prevalent to me and I could barely identify any band-aid characteristics. While I was not completely put off by this wine, it was not pleasurable wine to taste. Judging by my experience with this wine, I'd be willing to bet that brettheads, such as Parker, are actually more sensitive to 4-ethyl guaicol than the other two compounds. The second sample was loaded with VA and isovaleric acid. This wine was so fully of vinegar and vomit aromas that I could barely bring myself to smelling it after my first attempt. So, next time you you smell or taste these characteristics, you are most likely seeing the effects of Brett.

While I am not trying to tell people that they are wrong for enjoying the effects of Brett, the idea that it is somehow a characteristic of terroir and not flawed winemaking IS incorrect.

Faulty wine

Do you know why your waiter pours just a little bit of wine for you to try before pouring the rest of the bottle? And what are you supposed to do with the cork that is set on the table? The sample of wine is make sure that there are no faults with the wine; not to see if you actually like it. As for the cork, you can look at it but please don't smell it! If there are any markings, such as a date, stamped on it, make sure that they match the wine you ordered. If they don't your wine may have been tampered with. What happens if something is wrong with the wine or the cork? Simply notify your server and they should immediately correct the problem with a new bottle.

While not at a restaurant, I encountered a faulty bottle at home this week. One of the two glasses in the photo is flawed while the other is not. A few months ago, I saw a older Chardonnay from a Colorado producer that I enjoy on a clearance rack at my local wine shop. I knew that this particular producer doesn't add sulfites (used as a preservative in wine) and the storage conditions at the store weren't ideal but I decided the rewards of an aged Chardonnay outweighed the risks for only $12. I finally decided to open the bottle and wasn't all that surprised when the wine poured a deep golden brown color and smelled oxidized. Sure enough, the wine tasted very sherry-like (sherries are the most oxidized wines in the world but are made that way intentionally). The wine was undrinkable so I had to open a back up. Disappointed with this outcome, I didn't feel like opening another full bottle, so I decided on a 187 mL bottle of cheap California Sauvignon Blanc that I keep on hand for cooking. While the wine wasn't very good, there were no faults. So if this situation were to arise in a restaurant, don't hesitate to reject a faulty bottle of wine but if just don't like a wine it is what you ordered. If you have questions about a wine, any well-trained server or sommelier will be able to determine any faults for you!